Broken heroes, lucky fools
In 926, Magyar warriors conquered the Abbey of St Gall in what is now northeastern Switzerland. Most of the monks fled but a certain Heribald insisted he would not leave the abbot until he had been given his yearly allotment of shoe leather. The other monks tried to persuade the “simple-minded” brother to leave but Heribald couldn’t be budged and so was abandoned to his fate. When the Magyars arrived shortly afterwards, they quickly realized that Heribald was no threat, but, having demanded that he take them to the Abbey’s treasury, they were enraged to find it empty. Convinced that the cock that adorned the roof must be made of gold, two of the Magyars climbed up to inspect it. One slipped and tumbled to his death. The second, attempting to demonstrate his contempt for the Christian God, pulled down his trousers and prepared to defecate on the courtyard below. He too lost his balance and fell to his death. Heribald was spared.